Wild World | City Folk | New Leaf | Happy Home Designer Mostly taken from the game scripts and reformatted, so please excuse any errors in formatting, etc. Hey! HEY! You! Yeah, you! You're [NAME], right? Sure you are. Sure. Sure I know you! Sure! You? Big reputation. All over, everyone knows, bang. Look, I got a questionnaire, right? Need people to fill it out. Quick. Easy. Bang. You want to represent [TOWN]? Sure you do. Sure. Just fill it out. My boss? Bustin' my chops on this one ALL WEEK! Real quick. Easy. Fill it out. >Sounds fun! >Who are you? >Get lost! (Sounds fun!) Look, this questionnaire? It's nothing. Basic info, nothing you'll regret. [nodding emotion] Say the first thing in your head. Don't think, feel. Got it? Good. Bang! Here we go. [and then onto the questionnaire] (Who are you?) What? Oh, yeah, sure, right. Look. Here's the deal. Don't like it? Bang, I'm gone. Who am I? Lyle. What do I do? I sell. What do I sell? Peace of mind. Golden. I'm an agent. Insurance. Licensed, bonded, all legit, across the board, bang! >...What? >You're a creep. (You're a creep.) [wind emotion] You don't trust me. I can see that. OK, understood. You're careful, I like that. [sneaky emotion] Listen, this questionnaire? Couple of questions, real easy, nothing big. You answer these, I'm gone. No joke. Five minutes, done, bang, outta here. Ready? [sneaky emotion] Listen, here's the thing. Do you, and I'm just askin', but do you know a Mr. Redd? Short guy, black market, owns a tent? Yeah, right, him, you got it. Yeah, everybody knows Redd. Everybody. Crazy Redd, right? Bang! Right! So look, if you could pick a day for him to visit, which one ya want? What works? >Monday >Tuesday >Wednesday >Thursday >Friday (Pretty sure the answer is the same no matter what day you pick.) OK, good. Yeah, good, real good. Gotcha... BANG! Huh??? Yeah, can't fool you! What, me? Nah, Redd and me, we just know each other from around. No big! C'mon! Look, enough about Redd, right? Yeah, forget it. Next question, bang! What do you think of me? No, it's fine. Lyle can take it, no sweat, easy, bang. So. Face. Mine. What about it? You trust this face? Seriously, gimme the skinny. >Sure? >Um... >Not really. >No way. >Leave me alone! (Um... / Sure? - it might be the same no matter what you pick) [stunned emotion] [angry emotion; text balloon is shaking] ...Oh, you're BUSTIN' MY CHOPS here! Ab-so-lutely BUSTIN' these puppies! ...Yeah, so, no sweat, right? Right, sure, no sweat. Bang! Ha ha! Lyle got ya! Seriously, enough. You wanna move on? Yeah, sure, why not, right? Right. I got a few questions here. Ten. Actually, less. I got seven. Three. Ready? Bang! Q: My impression of the insurance community is a positive one. >Agree >Disagree (Agree) Q: The phrase "long-term hospitalization" makes me terribly, terribly afraid. >Agree >Disagree (Disagree) Q: I have put thought into my plans for the grim, inevitable future. >Agree >Disagree --------alt questionnaire: Q: The phrase "long-term hospitalization" makes me terribly, terribly afraid. >Agree >Disagree (Agree) Q: I have been the victim of frauds, scams, con jobs, or pyramid schemes. >Agree >Disagree (Agree) Q: If hurt or sick, I have a plan for the inevitable, awful outcome. >Agree >Disagree (Agree) [wind emotion] [angry emotion] ...Really? Bad call. BAD CALL! Think yer smart? Think yer big? BUST MY CHOPS?! [text balloon shakes] ...But hey, no sweat, right? Good info. Yeah. Sure. Need anything else? Talk to Lyle. (Disagree) ...Yeah, bad news. Real bad. You? You got big problems. Wanna hear 'em? Here we go. Alone. No plan. No safety net. Know what happens then? Right. Bad things. Listen, I'm gonna be blunt. The profile? You fit it. To a T. I mean, BANG! You need insurance. Not tomorrow. Not next week. Now. Right now. Me? I sell insurance. ACCIDENT insurance. No scam, no lie. All legit. [sneaky emotion] Injured? Had an accident? You'll receive compensation that very day! BANG! This deal? What a deal. Let me tell you. You like deals? Don't miss this one. You can have this for only 3,000 Bells! BANG! I know, crazy, right? Cra-zy. Let me help you. LET me HELP you. Sign this. Here. Right now. Whattya say? >Um... OK. >No way! (Um... OK.) [! emotion] Good! Good. You won't regret this, trust me. It's the right choice. All right. Look. Now I just need a name and address. Easy, right? Simple stuff. Right... Yes... Now gimme a chicken scratch here... [sneaky emotion] Bang! Finished! Kaput! [singing emotion] See? Easy. Real easy. I told you, best decision you'll ever make. Trust me. You got accident insurance now. No more worries. Ever. Trust me. Trust Lyle. Yeah, so, look. I need the 3,000 Bells. Just business, right? Strictly business. [you pay the fee] [shrugging emotion] You feel better, right? Sure you do. Safe? Warm? Yeah. All that. Sure you do. So look, if you're ever injured? My company? We send you compensation. [clapping emotion] It's what you deserve. What we ALL deserve, right? Right. Sure. Bang! ------------------------------------------------------------ HEY! YOU! Yeah, you! How you doing? Good, right? Sure you are, sure. You're from [TOWN], right? Sure you are. Lyle can tell. Lyle knows. Listen, my company. Doing research. Trying to drum up business. Basic stuff, legit. Gotta learn about hicks. No. City folk. Like you. Whoever. Doesn't matter. Look, just fill out this questionnaire. >Um... OK. >Who are you? >Not today. (Um... OK.) Look, this questionnaire? It's nothing. Basic info, nothing you'll regret. [nodding emotion] Say the first thing in your head. Don't think, feel. Got it? Good. Bang! Here we go. [Redd spiel goes here] ["What do you think of me" spiel goes here] I got a few questions here. Ten. Actually, less. I got seven. Three. Ready? Bang! Q: The phrase "long-term hospitalization" makes me terribly, terribly afraid. >Agree >Disagree (Agree) Q: I have put thought into my plans for the grim, inevitable future. >Agree >Disagree (Agree) Q: My impression of the insurance community is a positive one. >Agree >Disagree (Agree) ...Yeah, bad news. Real bad. You? You got big problems. Wanna hear 'em? Here we go. Alone. No plan. No safety net. Know what happens then? Right. Bad things. Listen, I'm gonna be blunt. The profile? You fit it. To a T. I mean, BANG! You need insurance. Not tomorrow. Not next week. Now. Right now. It's like this. You buy something? It's a fake? Counterfeit? Busted? Damage insurance. You're covered. Bang! Like I said, peace of mind, right? You come to us, give us the item, we pay you. It's easy. Legit. Totally legit. We pay you a percentage of the damages. Good deal, right? Sure it is. [sneaky emotion] You just gotta enroll. Pay a fee, real small. One-time fee. 6,000 Bells. That's it. Good deal. Not good. Great. Amazing. What's the catch? Nothing. Sign it. Sign it now. >Um, OK. >No way! (No way!) [wind emotion] Whoa, hey, wait, hold it. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold it. Hold it, whoa, wait, hold it. Me? Lyle? Didn't explain it well. Lemme try again. One minute. Here I go. This deal? Great deal. You won't find this deal again. It's that good. Bang. Lemme sweeten it. Sweeten the pot. The fee? Cut. Slashed. Huge discount. [sneaky emotion] Only 6,000 Bells! That's it, final offer. Sign it. Don't wait, don't think, sign. >OK, OK! >No way! (No way!) [he repeats the last set of dialogue] (OK, OK!) [! emotion] Good! Good. You won't regret this, trust me. It's the right choice. All right. Look. Now I just need a name and address. Easy, right? Simple stuff. Right... Yes... Now gimme a chicken scratch here... [sneaky emotion] Bang! Finished! Kaput! [singing emotion] There you go! Finished. Done. Easy, right? Sure it was... BANG! Ha ha, yeah, you! Now you're covered. You got damage insurance. No more worries. Ever. Trust me. ...What? No! Lyle wouldn't bust your chops on this one! We got trust, right? Sure we do. You just gotta pay the 6,000 Bells like you promised. That's it. Easy. [you pay the fee] ...Done! Listen, here's the thing. You ever get fooled? Duped? Taken? Bang? Bring it to me. You give me the fake item, I take care of everything. Percentage of the damages? Straight to you. Check's in the mail, that day, easy. ------------------------------------------------------------ You! Hey, wait, stop, wait. Listen, are you happy with life? Seriously, no joke. Gotcha, sure, right. You planning to move up in the world? Sure you are. Bang! Look, let me help. I wanna help you. Sound good? Sure it does. Relax. It's easy. What do you do? This questionnaire. Fill it out. Easy, right? Sure it is. Goals? We all got 'em. You got 'em, I got 'em, everybody. Let's do this. >Yes, let's! >Who are you? >I'm busy. (Yes, let's!) Look, this questionnaire? It's nothing. Basic info, nothing you'll regret. [nodding emotion] Say the first thing in your head. Don't think, feel. Got it? Good. Bang! Here we go. [Redd spiel, questionnaire, etc] ...Yeah, bad news. Real bad. You? You got big problems. Wanna hear 'em? Here we go. Alone. No plan. No safety net. Know what happens then? Right. Bad things. Listen, I'm gonna be blunt. The profile? You fit it. To a T. I mean, BANG! You need insurance. Not tomorrow. Not next week. Now. Right now. [Accident insurance spiel] Let me help you. LET me HELP you. Sign this. Here. Right now. Whattya say? (if you have less than 3,000 Bells..) [text balloon shakes] WHAT?! ...No money. You got no Bells. None. Zip. What's your problem? Huh? [annoyed emotion] You let me talk lik this? Waste your time? Waste MY time? BUST MY CHOPS?! [text balloon shakes] ...But hey, no sweat, right? Yeah, good. Good. next time, maybe. ------------------------------------------------------------ (Roost dialogue!) [Text balloon shakes] WHY YA BUSTIN' MY CHOPS?! I'm fine, right? Sure I am. Sure. Right. Get lost. --- This recession? Killin' me. You? Yeah, sure, right. Lyle hears that. Bang. Lyle needs a scheme. Rich. Quick. Getting. Me. Follow? Sure ya do. --- Listen. Words. You know 'em? Me too. Some words, I can't stand. Wanna know? >Tell me! >Don't care (Tell me!) ..."IRS." Not a word? I know. Lyle knows. Three words. Abbreviation. Don't matter. I'm legit. Aboveboard. All square. Do they listen? 'Course not. Bang. Been to jail? Me too. Three hots and a cot, right? Bad news. Bad deal. Listen to Lyle. Advice. Mine. Take it... Taxes? Pay 'em. --- Kids. You know 'em? Sure ya do. But them? The kids? Don't know nothin'. Useless. Always talkin'. Singin'. Makin' flowers and stuff shoot outta their heads. --- Turnips? Shoulda bought some. Had a chance. Thought it over. Didn't. Blew it. Know what? Now I'm busted. Got nothin'. But hey, what the deuce, right? Bang. --- Kids. You know 'em? Sure ya do. But them? The kids? Don't know nothin'. Useless. No smarts. Can't work the system. Close the deal. Always be closing, right? BANG! Right, sure. And their talk? Totally. Like. Pumped. Forget it, right? Right. --- This recession? Killin' me. You? Yeah, sure, right. Lyle hears that. Bang. If I owned real estate? I'm living the high life. Lyle really needed those leads... --- Stress? Listen, Lyle's got plenty. You too, right? Sure, stress, bang. This coffee shop? Busy. Too busy. Don't like it. You? Bang! Thought so. --- Labels. Everybody has 'em, right? Sure, labels. Happy. Sad. Loser. Right? Sure. Take me. Take Lyle. Folks call me sleaze. Sneak. Liar. Not true. I'm a peach. Sure, some deals don't work out, but hey, right? That's life. That's it. Bang. ------------------------------------------------------------ (Insurance payment letter) Hey. You. Yeah, [NAME]. Stung? By a bee? Lyle can tell. Your face? Gross. Here. The money? Yours. Benefits. Take 'em. BANG! -Lyle --- (Message in a bottle) Valued Patron Some Stranger This special offer is just for you! Sign up now, before it's too late! Don't be fooled by imitations! Your insurance agent, Lyle ------------------------------------------------------------ (Not Lyle, but a discussion about him!) [Pierce:] Dude, Static! What's wrong with your face, bro? Bro, you are lookin' even crankier than usual, hawkeye! [Static:] It's that insurance salesman, Lyle! That slimy-palmed sleazemonger won't leave me alone! He starts chasing me around town every time he sees me, krzzt! [Pierce:] [annoyed emotion] DUDE, Static! You're talkin' about that guy with the bar code! Y'know, a bar code? A comb-over? Hawkeye! [Static:] [annoyed emotion] Yeah, krzzt! I hope that guy takes a long walk into a pitfall! [they both walk away irritated]
Hey. You. Wait. Listen. Hold it. Stop. Just stop. Ol' Lyle needs to talk at ya for a second. Me? I'm Lyle. This place? Mine. Name? The Happy Room Academy. But enough about me. Let's talk about you. Your name? [NAME]. Bang! Ha ha! Old Lyle got ya, didn't he? Listen. You? Homeowner, right? Place in [TOWN]? Picket fence, wife and kids, living the dream? Lyle used to have dreams... Lyle used to have it all. Big car, corner office, bang. Then it all went to pot. Know what the boss said? "Offices are for closers." Guy busted my chops! You believe it? [angry emotion] [laughing emotion] Yeah, but enough, right? Right. My problems? Mine. Not yours. Let's talk. Letter. Mine. You got it? >I read every word! >Didn't read it. >You're scaring me. (I read every word!) Don't kid old Lyle, now! Ya really read the letter? BANG! Still got it! Lyle's still got the touch! [angry emotion] And they told me I was washed up... Ha ha! Forget it. Living in the past. Let it go. Bygones, right? Right. Anyway, enough. Let's go. Let's talk. You. Me. Brass tacks. The skinny. The sit. Here it is. [and then onto the "Houses are work" bit below] --- (Didn't read it.) Didn't read it? DIDN'T READ IT? You just here to waste my time? BUST MY CHOPS?! Wheeeeeew! Never mind. We're calm. Lyle's calm. Lemme tell ya the deal. [and then onto the "Houses are work" bit below] --- (You're scaring me.) Hey, wait, hold it. Me? Scare ya? Ha ha! You're having some fun with Lyle! I'm a peach. No joke. Bang. The letter? Not a problem. No worries. None. Maybe one. Never mind. The deal? Here it is. Houses are work, right? Sure! Get furniture. Set it here. Set it there. Move it around. Worry some more. If it don't look good, you don't feel good. But how do ya know when it's right? Instinct? Luck? Bang? [nodding emotion] And that's where I come in. [shocked emotion] Did I say me? I meant we. Us. This place. The Happy Room Academy. We show you how to make rooms. Good rooms. Rooms you can be proud of. HAPPY rooms. Here's the deal. This academy? Exclusive. Members only. Very chic. All that. But you? Good people. We like you. You should join. Come on. Join the Happy Room Academy. >I'd love to join! >No, thanks. (I'd love to join!) Good choice! Excellent! Glad to hear it! See a bull, take the horns, am I right? BANG! Ah ha ha ha! OK. Here's the deal. We're gonna be checking out your room. Looking at colors and furniture and whatnot. And when we're done? We give you a report. Tells ya how to snazz up the joint. Not home? Out? About? Doesn't matter. We let ourselves in. We got keys. Lots of 'em. Thousands. I see your face. You're worried. Don't be. This Academy? Legit. Above board. Totally legit. Oh, wait. There's more. Themes. We got themes. New ones. Each month. Decided by me. Right here? In the back? There's a model room. Shows the theme. Gives ya ideas. All that. [nodding emotion] Your room? Could be there. Could be the model room. If we like it? We'll pick it. Easy, right? Right. Bang! ...What's that? Me? You wanna know about me? [angry emotion] Ya ain't gonna bust my chops or nothing, right?! Yeah, well, OK. Sure. Meet and greet. Why not? Me? I'm Lyle. Chairman of the Happy Room Academy. [thinking emotion] This wasn't always my job. I used to be somebody. Big shot. Important. But stuff happens, yeah? Yeah... [sad emotion] Ha ha! Yeah. Enough about old Lyle. Welcome aboard, [NAME]! You? Me? Us? Together? ...Thrilled. [flowery emotion] --- (No, thanks.) WHAT?! Whoa, wait. Hold it. Hold it now. Wait. You and me? Misunderstanding. Lemme start over. The Academy? Free. No fees. No small print. Nothing. Above board. All legit. We just want you to be happy. When you're happy, Lyle's happy. Wanna see? Ah ha ha ha ha! So happy! Yeah, so whattya think? Wanna join? Come on. Do it. Do it now. >Sounds great! >No, thanks. [I assume if you click "Sounds great!" you get the "Good choice! Excellent!" dialogue listed above] (No thanks:) OK, now you're just BUSTIN' MY CHOPS! Ab-so-lute-ly BUSTIN' these puppies! Look. This Academy? Renowned. The world over. Everyone loves it. Moms. Dogs. Babies. All of 'em. Our research? Top'a the line. Studied by eggheads. Taught in college. You think old Lyle's lying to ya? No way! Nope! Never! Nuh-uh. Lyle's gone legit. We got a contest. Sign people up. First prize is a watering can. Second is a set of salad forks. Third prize is Lyle's fired. Come on. Do it for Lyle. Do it for yourself. Do it for the kids. Doesn't matter. Don't care. Just do it. >Well... OK. >No way! [I assume if you click "Well... OK" you get the "Good choice! Excellent!" dialogue listed above] (No way:) OK. OK. I getcha. Lyle gets ya. No, no. No worries. You're careful. Lyle likes that. Lyle understands. Listen, maybe you could go home. Think it over. Ask a friend. Sleep on it. That kind of thing. Change your mind? I'll be here. Got a cot in the back. Just lemme know. (grey text?) Old Lyle never shoulda taken this job. ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey! You! Wait! It's you! You came back! Oh, I KNEW ya wouldn't let ol' Lyle down! [NAME], welcome back to the Happy Room Academy! So. Your mind? Changed? Gonna join? Gonna be a member? ...C'mon, old Lyle really needs this. >I'm gonna join! >Not today. [Presumably "gonna join" gives you the standard "Good choice! Excellent!" text...] (Not today) You? Oh. Great. You. What now? Gonna hassle me? Gonna bust my chops some more? Go ahead. Why not? Kick old Lyle when he's down. Everyone else does. >I wanna join! >I'm not joining. [I assume the dialogue starts cycling at this point] ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey! Listen! [NAME]! Your room evaluation? Starts next week. Better get ready. We do 'em every Sunday. Curious? Wanna know how ya did? Just ask. The room evaluation? Yours? You wanna know how it went? Yeah, OK. Hold on. OK. Score. Yours. Here it is. Your latest evalution got you [NUMBER] points. Huh? How's that? Ya wanna know what the evaluators said? Sure. Lyle'll tell ya. Why not? Uh-huh. Yep. There it is. You want a better score? Curious how to get one? Try following that advice. Bang. ------------------------------------------------------------ Huh? Customers? Great. ...A-HEM! Welcome! Welcome to the Happy Room Academy! Listen. Let's talk. You? Me? We're gonna... Hey! It's you! It's [NAME]! Ah ha ha! Old Lyle was about to give ya the whole song and dance! So? Let's talk. Whatcha need? >The model room. >My latest eval. >Letters. >Nothing. ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey? You? Got a question? Bang! Let's talk. What can old Lyle help ya with today? >The model room. >My latest evaluation. >Letters. >Nothing. (The model room.) That's it, huh? You sure? Well, model room's in the back. Take yer time. Lyle ain't going nowheres... [sad emotion] --- (Letters.) Letters? What? Our letters? From the Academy? Yeah. OK. Sure. Right. Sure. We send you letters. What? What's wrong? You want us to stop? >Please stop! >No, that's fine. (Please stop!) OK. Sure. Sure. No worries. The letters? Gone. Poof. Bang. No more. But hey. You get curious? Wanna see your evaluation? Come here. Academy HQ. We post 'em. Oh, the letters? If ya miss 'em? Talk to Lyle. He can start ya up again. (If you ask him about letters again) What? What now? What is it? We sent letters. You said no. We stopped. Easy, right? Sure it is. Bang. You change your mind? Miss the letters? Want old Lyle to send them again? >Yes, please! >No, that's fine. (Yes, please!) Nice! Good! Great! Bang! The letters? All yours. We'll send 'em again. Change your mind? Lemme know! I can stop. Saves the postage. Saves my chops. --- (The model room.) This month's theme? Hold on. Lemme see. Bang! It's [current theme]. [nodding emotion] So. Themes. You know 'em, right? We come up with 'em, then pick the room that matches. Easy. Bang. This month? You. Your room. Big winner. Totally true. Nice job. Remember, Lyle loves ya. All right. Let's do this. That room? Nice. That furniture? Real nice. Lyle digs it. So. Nice. We agree. What's left? One word. Consistency. Wait. Let's talk. You? Me? The room? The stuff? The [ITEM]?! Now, Lyle's not a man to pry, but he's gotta know... WHERE'D THEY GET THAT PUPPY?! [text box shakes] Lyle's been BUSTIN' HIS CHOPS trying to find him a [ITEM]! That piece? Won a prize. The Happy Room Academy Award for Outstanding Achievement in Furniture. You get one'a those? We give ya bonus points out the wazoo. There's a tip from Lyle to you. So, now? [NAME]'s room. On display. In the back. Take a look. Bang. Happy rooms? Keep makin' 'em. Good luck. ...Lyle's trying to love this job! Look at him dance! [singing emotion] Anything else Lyle can help ya with? >The model room. >My evaluation. >Letters. >Nothing. (Nothing.) That's it, huh? You sure? Well, model room's in the back. Take yer time. Lyle ain't going nowheres... [sad emotion] ------------------------------------------------------------ [nodding emotion] So. Themes. You know 'em, right? We come up with 'em, then pick the room that matches. Easy. Bang. This month's winner? Kid from [TOWN]. Name's [NAME]. Go out. Shake a hand. ------------------------------------------------------------ So. Themes. Each month we pick a new one. It's fun, right? Sure it is. Sure. But this month... No rooms matched. None. Zero. Zip. Nada. Ixnay. You guys are bustin' Lyle's chops here! Ah, who is Lyle kiddin'? I just ain't cut out for this... ------------------------------------------------------------ So. Here's the thing. My first thought? About the model room? It's this... [ITEM]? Nice. Real nice. Relaxed. Refined. Fits the mood. It's got style. Elegance. All that. You dig? Good. ------------------------------------------------------------ This month? You. Your room. Big winner. Totally true. Nice job. Remember, Lyle loves ya. So. Here's the thing. My first thought? About the model room? It's this... Innocent. Dreamy. Like one'a them genius kids decided to steal your cash and go redecorate. Lyle especially likes the [ITEM]. Fits the mood. Sets the scene. Bang. Wait. Let's talk. You? Me? The room? The stuff? The [ITEM]?! Now, Lyle's not a man to pry, but he's gotta know... WHERE'D THEY GET THAT PUPPY?! [text box shakes] Lyle's been BUSTIN' HIS CHOPS trying to find him a [ITEM]! That piece? Won a prize. The Happy Room Academy Award for Outstanding Achievement in Furniture. You get one'a those? We give ya bonus points out the wazoo. There's a tip from Lyle to you. Oh. Hey. Gimme a sec. Let ol' Lyle bend yer ear. That room? That layout? Nice. Lyle's a big fan. [nodding emotion] Ya got furniture. Ya got the room. And ya got both workin' like a charm! [flowery emotion] So, now? [NAME]'s room. On display. In the back. Take a look. Bang. Happy rooms? Keep makin' 'em. Good luck. ...Lyle's trying to love this job! Look at him dance! [singing emotion] Anything else Lyle can help ya with? >The model room. >My evaluation. >Letters. >Nothing. [etc] ------------------------------------------------------------ Wait. Hey. That room? It's got a theme going. Mario, right? Sure it is. Sure. It's even got carpet and wallpaper. Nice touch. Lyle digs it. Reminds Lyle of his old place. Oh. Hey. Wait. Hold it. The [ITEM]? Nice. Very nice. Academy loved it. Totally. Bang. But hey. That piece? Kinda weird. Odd. Unusual. Bit hard to score, if ya know what I mean. But what the hey, right? Who cares what a buncha eggheads think. Oh. Wait. Listen. Here's the thing. We gotta talk. About the [ITEM] back there. Yeah. [shrugging emotion] That furniture? Don't really match. Some from here. Some from there. Ya get what Lyle's sayin'? But hey. Maybe that's the plan. Lyle don't know. Do what makes ya happy, I guess. So, now? [NAME]'s room. On display. In the back. Take a look. Bang. [etc] ------------------------------------------------------------ So. Here's the thing. My first thought? About the model room? It's this... The [ITEM]! That puppy is in JUST the right place. I mean, BANG, kid! BANG! [nodding emotion] Yeah, that's smart. Puttin' red stuff in the east? Helps ya make decisions and whatnot. That feng shui should help ya at the ol' glueworks. Or with the lottery. And that furniture? Hoo-ee! Yeah, Lyle saw it. Like one'a them holiday parties in there! [shrugging emotion] Me? Nah. Lyle's got no holiday plans. Probably go home. Drink some nog. Bust some chops. Ya know. ------------------------------------------------------------ [nodding emotion] So. Themes. You know 'em, right? We come up with 'em, then pick the room that matches. Easy. Bang. This month's winner? Kid from [TOWN]. Name's [NAME]. Ya see him? Tell him congrats. So. Here's the thing. My first thought? About the model room? It's this... It's got good style. Refined. Urbane. Classy. And Lyle's a real big fan of that there [ITEM]. It's scratched? Well loved? Antique? No problem. Gives it character. ...Just like ol' Lyle. [sad emotion] Wait. Let's talk. You? Me? The room? The stuff? The [ITEM]?! Now, Lyle's not a man to pry, but he's gotta know... WHERE'D THEY GET THAT PUPPY?! [text box shakes] Lyle's been BUSTIN' HIS CHOPS trying to find him a [ITEM]! That piece? Won a prize. The Happy Room Academy Award for Outstanding Achievement in Furniture. You get one'a those? We give ya bonus points out the wazoo. There's a tip from Lyle to you. ...Ideas? You got some? Good. Great. Wonderful. Bang. Now go make some happy rooms! [flowery emotion] Lyle really hates this job. [sad emotion] Anything else Lyle can help ya with? ------------------------------------------------------------ That room? Hip. Modern. Nice. And not like them kids with the hats and the 8-tracks and stuff. Classy. Lyle especially digs the [ITEM]. Wish I had the scratch to get me one'a those... ------------------------------------------------------------ The [ITEM]! That puppy is in JUST the right place. I mean, BANG, kid! BANG! Folks say ya wanna put yellow stuff in the west. Brings luck. Gives ya money and whatnot. It's feng shui. Don't ask Lyle. He don't know. Boss made Lyle take a class, but he fell asleep. Shoulda paid attention. Lyle sure could use a bit'a that coin. ------------------------------------------------------------ The [ITEM]! That puppy is in JUST the right place. I mean, BANG, kid! BANG! It's green. That's why. Green. You know 'bout green? Put it in the south. Brings healing. Maybe ol' Lyle should take a vacation in that room! If the boss ever gives me a day off! And this furniture? Great. Excellent. Top'a the line. Ol' Lyle'd do most anything for sticks like that. Kid must've been plannin' for Halloween. Kinda early, right? Sure it is. Sure. But whatever. Lyle don't care. Me? If I had nice furniture? I'd put it on the lawn so folks'd know Lyle made the big time! ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh, and hey. That room? Crazy? Cra-a-a-a-zy. It's like one'a them Halloween parties in there! Not for Lyle. No, sir. Uh-uh. Halloween's creepy. Too many clowns. Ol' Lyle hates clowns. And that furniture? Nice. Real nice. Grade-A. Looks like someone's gettin' ready for the holidays. Kinda early, doncha think?! Aw, heck. Don't mind ol' Lyle. Holidays just make him a little sad. ------------------------------------------------------------ And hey. That furniture? In the model room? Nice. Someone busted hump at that Harvest Festival. Not really Lyle's taste. Not that you care. Buncha turkeys? Feathers and junk? What the hey, right? Aw, don't worry 'bout Lyle, kid. He's got a crate for a bed. Just jealous, is all. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Wait. The furniture? in that room? Nice. Real nice. Got it from the Harvest Festival, right? Sure. Good time'a year for it. Autumn. Gettin' cold. Leaves divin' off the trees and whatnot. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Yeah. Wait. Check that furniture. The eggs? Saw it. Logged it. Loved it. Someone spent a piece in the coal mine on Bunny Day, am I right? Sure I am. Bang! Ha ha, Lyle got ya! And don't let no one tell ya it's the wrong season! Eggs are fun. All the time. Even in winter. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey? That furniture? Bang, kid. Bang. Like a Bunny Day party in the house or whatever. That much bric-a-brac? Matchin' like that? Feels nice. Feels special. Lyle digs it. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. hey. Wait. Let's talk about furniture. The model room? That's some high-class sticks right there! All the Gracie furniture? In one room? Never seen it. Old Lyle especially liked the [ITEM]. Gettin' all that together? Lotsa time. Lotsa scratch. Lyle's feelin' mighty jealous right about now. ------------------------------------------------------------ And hey. That furniture? Nice. Real nice. Heck, someone got the whole [ITEM] series. Kinda like it was made for that room, am I right? Sure I am. Sure. That's some nice work right there. Oh. Hey. That furniture? Nice. Real nice. Someone's workin' hard on the ol' [ITEM] series. Not complete, though. One thing missin'. Lyle can't quite put his paw on it. ------------------------------------------------------------ Bang! Wait! Hey! Furniture. Let's chat. Someone's goin' for the [ITEM] series right there. Well, they missed the carpet and wallpaper! [...does he freak out here or something? there's two lines of symbols] Aw, sorry 'bout that. These are lean times for Lyle. He gets a bit punchy. ------------------------------------------------------------ And hey. That furniture? Got a theme goin'. Kind of [ITEM], am I right? Sure I am. Sure. Lyle loves themes. His place has a theme. Wanna know what it is? Flat busted! Aw, sorry. Lyle shouldn't saddle ya with his problems and junk. ------------------------------------------------------------ Nice. Nice job. Huh? What's Lyle talkin' about? Furniture. Series. [ITEM]. Someone went and got themselves a complete series! Really brings the room together. ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey. also. Color. Let's talk about it. That room? Nice. Color matches. Uniform. Classy. Lyle likes it when stuff's one color. Makes it easy on the peepers. ------------------------------------------------------------ Wait. Hey. That room? That furniture? Nice. Real nice. Someone got a good set'a sticks there, kid. The theme? Simple. Real simple. But that's OK. Lyle's a simple guy. It's almost like Lyle was back at his parents' home. Before everything went to pot. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. That room? Full'a instruments. Guitars. Banjos. Drums. Horns. Accordions. Whatnot. Someone startin' a band? Lyle used to sing in a band! Ol' Lyle and the Bangs! Good times. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Wait. That place? Full'a plants. Lots. Tons. Thousands. Not that many. But a lot. Lyle likes plants. Helps him relax. [Grey text?] Maybe he oughta quit this racket and go plant a garden. ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey. Wait. Guess what? That room? Full of art. You probably knew that. You can see. Nice stuff. Nice paintings. Lyle wanted to be an artist once. Couldn't cut it. Allergic to paint. ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey. That room? Full of models. Good ones. High quality. Grade-A. Top'a the line. Lyle approves. Must've cost fair coin for all them models. Lyle knows. Lyle used to collect models. Back in the day. Had to sell 'em all when the business went under... ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey. Look. That room? Full'a dolls. No joke. No jive. No flimflam. Dolls. Lots of 'em. Tons. Ol' Lyle don't like dolls. No sir. Creepy. Beady eyes. Little hands. Fake hair. Fake smiles. Pointy teeth. The dolls? Them? Might come alive. Can't outrun a doll. Then what? ...BANG! Doll food. ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey. Look. Listen. We need to talk. You and me. 'Bout that room. There's a problem. Wanna hear it? [ITEM] back there? Yeah. Layin' around. All over. Big mess. Place looks like a junkyard. ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey. Look. Listen. We need to talk. You and me. 'Bout that room. There's a problem. Wanna hear it? [ITEM] back there? Facin' the wall! The WALL! For the love'a clams! That really busts my chops! Listen. Don't be like that. Your stuff? Turn it around. Come on. Get with the program. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Yeah. Wait. Let's talk. The layout? Of that room? Kinda weird. Lyle's just sayin', is all. Simple, right? Clean? Pure? All that noise? Yeah, Lyle gets it. Lyle likes clean. [ITEM]. (?) [Grey text?] Reminds him of the clink. ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey. Here's the thing. That place? Full'a stuff. Lotsa stuff. Maybe too much. Maybe not. Lyle can't say. But it's packed. Crammed. Bustin' at the seams. Kinda like my chops. ------------------------------------------------------------ What else? What else? Oh, yeah. The snowman. Nice piece. Nice. Made me think'a my daughters. When they were small? Little ones? Loved the snow. Loved it. Used to ask Daddy to push 'em around. But now? ...Yeah. We don't do that so much any more. Ya spend yer winters in the hoosegow? Snow ain't pretty no more! ------------------------------------------------------------ What else? ...Bang! Sure! The birthday cake! Nice touch. Made me think'a my last birthday. The boys made me a cake outta what we had around. Used a match for a candle. Wish we woulda had a file to bake in there... ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Right. That portrait? Nice snap. Nice. Made me think'a the last picture I ever took. Wore a nice suit. Good tie. Fine shoes. One shot from the front and one from the side. Wanna see it? Try the post office. Might still be hanging there. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Wait. Also? Let's talk. That Big Festive Tree? It's fun. Lyle digs it. Outta season, but what the hey? Maybe Lyle will get himself a tree this year. Pop some corn. Call the kids. Kiss the wife. Bang! ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Wait. Also? Let's talk. That Big Festive Tree? It's fun. Lyle digs it. Winter, right? Bang. Been a while since ol' Lyle got a present. Long time. Years. Couldn't get 'em where I was... But this year? Got one. From the wife. Just like the old days. It gives Lyle hope, ya know? ------------------------------------------------------------ Wait. Ya know what else? Chocolates. There's some in that room. Ol' Lyle loves him some chocolate. Got whatcha might call a sweet tooth. Not teeth. Tooth. Just one. My other teeth like clams. ------------------------------------------------------------ Wait. Ya know what else? Chocolates. There's some in that room. Ol' Lyle loves him some chocolate. Lyle's daughter gave him some chocolate. On Valentine's Day. Last one. Right after I got out... Kids. Grow up fast, huh? ...Sniff. Aw, now Lyle's cryin'! Lyle hates cryin'! ------------------------------------------------------------ What else? What else? Oh! [ITEM]! Ol' Lyle loves him some Halloween furniture! Feels like fall. Even if it's not. And it isn't. Not fall yet. Too early. Or late. Or something. But Lyle digs it anyway! ------------------------------------------------------------ What else? What else? Oh! [ITEM]! Ol' Lyle loves him some Halloween furniture! It's like someone brought fall into the room and whatnot. ------------------------------------------------------------ What else? What else? Oh! [ITEM]. That? Holiday theme. Right now? Not the holidays! Aw, never mind, kid. Lyle didn't mean nothing by it. It looks real nice in there. ------------------------------------------------------------ What else? What else? Oh! [ITEM]. Holiday furniture? Nice. Nice touch. Lyle approves. Like bringin' winter into yer room. But without the cold. And the ice. And the snow. And the whatnot. ------------------------------------------------------------- What else? What else? Oh! [ITEM]! Harvest Festival, right? Sure it is. Sure. Outta season? That's OK. Use it anyway. Looks nice. Looks good. Classes up the joint. ------------------------------------------------------------ What else? What else? Oh! [ITEM]! Ol' Lyle loves himself some Harvest Festival furniture! Why? Dunno. Somethin' about it, I guess. Turkeys just crack ol' Lyle up! ------------------------------------------------------------ What else? What else? Oh! [ITEM]! Bunny Day, right? Yeah, Lyle understands. But right now? Is it Bunny Day? Nope. Not even close. Doesn't matter. Everyone loves bunnies. ------------------------------------------------------------ What else? What else? Oh! [ITEM]! Bunny Day, right? Sure it is. Sure. Looks good. Adds charm. Makes the house feel like an egg carton or whatnot. Lyle appreciates that. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Wait. Lyle almost forgot. Those clothes. They got left out. Used for decorations. Ya think they forget to put 'em away? Ran outta closet space? Felt like bein' lazy? Bang? Ah ha ha! Lyle got ya! Look at your face! No. Wait. Seriously. The clothes? They look nice there. ------------------------------------------------------------ Hey. Lyle near forgot. That's one heckuv'n aquarium in there. Am I right? Sure. Ya see it? Ya stare. Can't stop. Can't look away. Hypnotic. Like one'a them guys with the gold watch. Lyle's scared of the water. Bad things down there. Really bad things. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh! Check it out! Looks like someone got themselves [ITEM]! Aw, Lyle LOVES gyroids! it's that sound. Click. Click. Whrrr. Click. Boop. Beep. Bop. Clicky. Clacky. Clunk. Bap. Bip. Boop. BANG! Ah ha ha ha ha! Ol' Lyle's gotta get himself a gyroid! ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh! Hey! I near forgot! [ITEM]! Heck, that room's got a BUNCHA gyroids, right? Ain't nothin' in the world better'n a gyroid. Makes Lyle happy as a pig in slop! Fact is? Lyle's so happy, he's gonna get to dancin'! Go, Lyle, go! Cut some rug! Bang, baby! ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. That fossil? Saw it. Logged it. Loved it. Kinda scary? Sure. But nice. Fossils creep Lyle out. He used to dig 'em up. In the yard. Not the backyard. The other yard. Forget it. Anyway, you like 'em, right? Sure ya do. Sure. Good luck with that. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. Those fossils? Saw 'em. Logged 'em. Loved 'em. Kinda scary. Sure. But nice. Buncha different ones all hanging around? Kinda scary. Ol' Lyle don't want fossils in his house, no sir! But hey. That collection? Pretty nice. Lyle approves. Just keep 'em away from me! ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. Musical instruments. All over the place. Someone tryin' to start a band? Aw, Lyle's just yankin' your chain. Me? Ignore. Can't play a note. Tone deaf. Can't even play the kazoo. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. Those plants? Nice. Not too many. Not too few. Just right. Lyle owned a plant once. Watered it. Fed it. Talked to it. Died anyway. Stupid plants. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. Paintings. Those. Got a few. Someone's a big art fan, eh? Lyle got into art once. Couple'a nice pieces. Took 'em off a guy for a song... Best not to talk about it. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. That room's got lamps. Lots. What's the deal? Startin' a moth collection? Ah ha ha ha! Moths? Get it? 'Cause of all the lamps? And moths... Never mind. Nice lamps anyway! ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. The clocks. In the room. What's with that? Someone can't wake up? Lyle got used to not havin' a clock where he was. But now? The wife? Wakes me every morning. ...Truth? It ain't half bad. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. Those chairs. How many are in there? Fifty? A million? Lotsa chairs. Must have a ton of friends. That it? Must be nice. Ol' Lyle wouldn't mind a few friends. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. Those dressers. What's up with that? Looks like the room for one'a them folks what has to organize socks by color. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. Those stereos. How many are in there? Tons, right? Sure. Sure. Listen. Lyle? Not a man to judge. Not gonna say one way or another. But advice? Free. Here it is... Get 'em outta the house before the heat comes! ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. Those TVs. What's up with that? Someone got one'a them art projects goin' on? Lyle ain't into modern art! Buncha colors and lights! Makes no sense! BUSTS MY CHOPS!! Hey, but no worries, right? Sure, sure. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. That room. Those beds. Lots. What's the deal? Ol' Lyle used to have a buncha beds. Then he just had one! Now he's tryin' to build back up. But good for this room, anyway. Nice to see a kid keepin' the dream alive. ------------------------------------------------------------ Oh. Hey. Lyle near forgot. There's a buncha fish or bugs or whatever in that room, right? Sure. Bang. Lyle used to enjoy a day down at the ol' fishin' hole. [grey text?] Now he's lucky if he can sneak an hour at lunch. ------------------------------------------------------------ (Letters!) Hey! [NAME]! Your room earned 205,321 points. Bang! Your pieces? Most of 'em? Nice. Rare. Impressive. We're givin' ya a lucky bonus. Congrats. From the HRA. Bang. --- Hey! [NAME]! Your room? Got 208,517 points. Bang! Your space? Comfy. Quaint. Livable. All that. Ol' Lyle wants to get himself a piece'a that action. From the HRA. Bang.
[if you talk to Lyle while visiting a different town] Yes! Happy Home Academy here. Me? Area manager. You? A bit lost. Lost and bustin' my chops, I think. Homeowner? Course you are! And I bet the HHA guy in your town is great. And handsome as all get out. ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Oh! Mr./Ms. [NAME]! OK. Let's talk. Been to the Able Sisters shop recently? You know! The sisters? Run the tailoring shop? With the clothes? And the designs? I know you know! Little inside info: The other day? Mr. Nook and I? Met with 'em. Talked business. Boom. And can I say something? Those sisters? Seem to be close to you, Mr. Nook... Must go way back, eh? Well. Anyway. We got an invite. Bit of a sit-down. Even the gal who's always working took time. Boom. Served us tasty mint ice cream. Best I've had! Gotta say...that Mr. Nook. So popular! Everywhere he goes! People love him! LOVE him. (Nook) [sweating emotion] Mr. Lyle! We had some delicious mint ice cream! It's a tasty, popular and innocent dessert! (Lyle) Ho ho ho! Mr. Nook! I do believe you're blushing! [note: the dessert varies, I've seen it as "kugel", "pumpkin pie","parfait"...] --- (alt:) (Nook) Mr. Lyle! It's not like that at all! Stop gabbing and get back to work! ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Say. Mr./Ms. [NAME]. Been to Leif's shop? The other day? Me. Him. Bunch of others. Had a weed-pulling contest. Right in the shopping district. Bang. Hey, Mr. Nook. Remember Leif? That day? He was amazing. Usually a relaxed fellow, that Leif. Not fast paced. Never in a hurry. Nice fella. [thinking emotion] And well liked. Practically the shopping-district mascot. So calm all the time! At least I thought so. Then boom. Guy launches into this big lecture. Environmental concerns. Big talk! So full of energy. Got me riled up! Went on and on. Overdid it a bit. Fainted after he stopped talking... (Nook) Well...he did go on for four hours. Leif's passionate spiel sure got everyone fired up, though! He had us pulling weeds until late at night despite the crazy heat! (Lyle) Well. The matter's settled. Far as I'm concerned. Don't think anyone can argue. Bang. Guy's environmentally minded. No question. Made me feel like I need to pay closer attention to this stuff. ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Mr./Ms. [NAME]. Let's talk. Been to the raccoon brothers' shop lately? You know! The brothers? Timmy and Tommy? With the selling of all the stuff? The cool, cool stuff? Little inside info: The other day? Mr. Nook and I? Met with 'em. Talked business. Bang. Mr. Nook? Can I guess? Took 'em under your wing, right? Bang? Little apprentices? Anyway. Mr. Nook. Kind of stern with the wee ones. Gave 'em a talking to. Caught ol' Lyle off guard. Suppose it's not unusual. Older, wiser businessman. Firm hand with the younger generation? Bang. (Nook) Mr. Lyle...I merely wanted those boys to know that when their shop opened we became rivals, hm? [shrug emotion] And I warned them that, as they continue to grow, other businesses will try to cut in on their action! I told them they are responsible for their own success, and I'm not going to pull any punches! That's all! (Lyle) Sure, sure. Ol' Lyle gets it. Throw 'em in the deep end. Teach 'em to swim. Swim with sharks. Bang. But you? Kinder than you seem, I think. I've seen you. Stealthy. Sneakin' out to check on 'em. Bang! (Nook) What?! I-I was going out for a stroll, hm? I may have peeked in their window, but...it's just business! (Lyle) Ho ho! Mr. Nook! Can it be? The consummate professional? Blushing? Boom! ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Mr./Ms. [NAME]! Let's chat. You know the GracieGrace boutique? Course you do. Ol' Lyle took a look. Great place! Gracie? Runs the joint? Great gal. Me? Um...went there for work. Market research. Bang. Sure. Ol' Lyle's familiar. Familiar with fancy shops. Shoppes even. Long time ago. 'Nother life. 'Nother time. Anyway. Gracie's store? Just what I expected. Renowned brand. Quality merchandise. Ol' Lyle's impressed! Mr. Nook. If ol' Lyle remembers it right... You and Gracie? Go way back. Right? Sure. Boom. Anyway. Told her I was with Nook of Nook's Homes. That got her going. Couldn't stop gabbin'. Said you two are old pals. Used to get up to shenanigans. You never cease to amaze, Mr. Nook. Bang. (Nook) ...Heh heh. That Gracie. She was such a free spirit. She's got a real wild streak, that one, hm? Everyone was always worried about whether or not she'd straighten up and make her way in the world... It's actually quite surprising that she stuck with being a designer lo these many years. I'm very happy for her! (Lyle) [lightbulb emotion] Well. Ol' Lyle? Blown away. So many secrets. Unexpected. Gracie? A wild child? Who knew? Not me! Hoo! It sure is something. Bang. Learn somethin' new every day. (Nook) I'm just glad to see an old confidant doing so well for herself! (Lyle) Yep. GracieGrace brand furniture. Pretty much anyone would be lucky to have some. And Gracie? Quite the amazing person! Quality crafter all the way. Love it! --- (alt:) (Nook) ...Heh heh. That Gracie. She was such a free spirit. She's got a real wild streak, that one, hm? It was really difficult to get it into her head that you need money to live. You need to earn a living! I never imagined that someday she'd be able to get away with charging the prices she does. ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Oh! Mr./Ms. [NAME]! Question: Ever been to Shampoodle? Beauty salon? Fix you right up. Bang. Talkin' 'bout a little place you oughta know. Run by Harriet? Great gal. Great service. Boom. Went for the first time the other day. Felt great! Little fur trim. Whisker wax. Ol' Lyle's a new man. Hmm? Mr. Nook? You stopped by Shampoodle too! Ol' Lyle can tell! Everyone who leaves Shampoodle leaves happy. Bang. Refreshed. Boom. Revived. Bam. Revitalized. Exactly how... Mr. Nook looks now. (Nook) Hm? Didn't you know? I stop by Shampoodle every day before heading to work. It's the basis of good manners to make oneself aesthetically pleasing. Shows respect for customers, hm? (Lyle) Boom! I never knew! Every day? So much effort! So much care! So much our customers don't realize! Floored. Ol' Lyle is floored. Still so much to learn from the master. (Nook) Well, my dear Mr. Lyle, it seems you have already learned quite a lot! Deducing from my countenance that I had been to Shampoodle - simply amazing! You've really grown! (Lyle) Shocked. Ol' Lyle is now shocked. Too kind a compliment, sir. I blush. Fact: I learn from you. Daily. Still. Does make a guy feel good to hear you say that, Mr. Nook. Bang! ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Oh! Mr./Ms. [NAME]! Club LOL. Do you go often? Lately I've been studying. Yes. Me. Studying. Under the club owner. Name of Shrunk. Ah. Studying. Might be overselling it a bit. More of a joking situation. Shrunk teaches me puns. Bam! He's got zingers! Zingers indeed! Keeps Mr. Nook and me on our toes. Quite a character, that one! The other day? We're there on business. Ol' Shrunk? Challenges Mr. Nook to a joke-off! Boom! Shrunk says "You've got to have a sense of humor if you want to be a good businessman!" Believe that? Bitter pill for Mr. Nook. To get served like that. Fightin' words! I thought it was on! But no dice. (Nook) Now now, Mr. Lyle! You must forget all about that! I simply didn't have enough time to prepare is all! There's no bad blood. I have a lot of respect for Shrunk. He's an amazing fellow who has accomplished a lot! (Lyle) Bwaaaaaa! I know! I know. Such hardships overcome. Such devotion to jokes! Ol' Lyle respects him, too! Mr./Ms. [NAME]! Take note! Funny folks? Examples for all of us. And Shrunk? Role model. Truly. Boom. --- (alt:) (Nook) Now now, Mr. Lyle! You must forget all about that! I simply didn't have enough time to prepare is all! There's no bad blood. I have a lot of respect for Shrunk. He's an amazing fellow who has accomplished a lot! When it comes to customer joy, he's the best of the best! I want to learn his secrets for being loved by all! (Lyle) Got it! That Shrunk. Certainly has admirers of all stripes! Go ahead. Count ol' Lyle among 'em. Boom! Color my chops busted! Didn't think a would-be joke-off could lead to such serious emotions! Bam! ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Oh! Mr./Ms. [NAME]! Let's chat. K.K. Slider. Know him? Famous musician? Floppy ears? Get this: The other day? Stopped in. The mutt. The myth. The legend. Boom. Right here. Holding a show that night, wasn't he, Mr. Nook? Big show. What a rock star. Ol' Lyle was in awe! Some insider info: Mr. Nook? Die-hard K.K. fan! Familiar with the artist's full discography! No kidding! And his face! When K.K. walked through the door? Priceless! So excited! Made ol' Lyle chuckle. (Nook) Mr. Lyle! I wasn't that excited! I was merely caught off guard. That's all it was! And anyway... My excitement was rendered ineffectual since you monopolized his time, Mr. Lyle! (Lyle) What? Ol' Lyle?! A K.K. hog?! Never! No way! Not a chance! You... are busting chops again, Mr. Nook! OK. I overdid it a bit... Some history there, though. Worked together ages ago. Had some catching up to do! (Nook) That's it! I can draw on Mr. Lyle's acquaintance with K.K. to help me ingratiate myself with the rock star! It's been my lifelong dream... to get his autograph and have my picture taken with him! (Lyle) Ha ha ha! We'll see, Mr. Nook. We'll see. Such a fan. Like a teenager! Does ol' Lyle's heart good! ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Oh! Mr./Ms. [NAME]! You've met Phyllis, right? The gal? At the post office? Works the night shift? Yes! Right! I'm guessing you've met her. Anyhoo. Phyllis. Frequent visitor. Stops by here. Afternoon, usually. Says she doesn't like being seen outside of work. Embarrassed when she runs into residents. Little odd. But she's here all the time! Isn't that right, Mr. Nook? Here all the time. No qualms about it. Boom. And... There's her younger sister. Pelly? Works the post office during the day? Right? Right. Get this: Phyllis. Says she's worried. That Pelly might need her for something! So she gets up early! Must be exhausted. Poor girl. Rarely sleeps. Afraid she'll collapse from overdoing it, aren't we, Mr. Nook? (Nook) That Phyllis is a total workaholic! It's like she can't relax unless she's working! That's no way to live! I'm familiar with what it's like to throw oneself into one's work, but her tunnel vision is absurd! Phyllis is being overprotective! Pelly can handle things on her own! The younger ones can't grow if the older ones meddle too much! (Lyle) Dangerous ground, though. She'd be upset if we told her that. "Mind your own business!" She'd say that. Bam! ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Oh! Mr./Ms. [NAME]! Question. You've met Celeste, right? Younger sister of Blathers? Works at the museum? Very owly? Right. Get this: Other day. Mr. Nook and I? Went to the museum. Needed our interior-design expertise. Naturally. But this Celeste! So inquisitive! And smart! But relentless! On and on with the queries! Yap, yap, yap! Barrage of questions, right, Mr. Nook? Barrage of questions! Ol' Lyle? Busted! Right in the chops! Started out nice and calm. Sure. Then, bam! Got super excited about home construction! Intensely so! Question after question! Finance, materials, ratings. Happy Home Academy! So many questions! Blathers finally put a stop to it. Ol' Lyle loves guiding the younger ones. But this one? Exhausting! Boom! (Nook) Heh heh. Celeste does love research. I do believe she'd rather study than sleep. I'm impressed, to be honest. She's been like that ever since she was a tiny owlet, all gab and not much quiet contemplation. But despite how it seems, she is growing up. She's working on her manners. She's just excitable! Celeste is an odd bird, to be sure. It seems she'd prefer debating to eating three square meals a day! And Blathers is quiet, but he's not shy about correcting someone when he or she needs it. I bet an argument between the two of them would be nothing short of spectacular! But we must respect the girl's inquisitiveness, Mr. Lyle. I, for one, enjoy that kind of curiosity! ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Little excited here! Ol' Lyle? Invited into the Reset Surveillance Center the other day! Kaboom! Yes! That very one! Very secret. Rare thing, outsiders getting in. All business. No fooling around! So exciting! So amazing! Can't share any details, though. Strictly confidential. Ol' Lyle's not talking! (Nook) Can you believe it?! Mr. Lyle really won't tell me a single thing about what he saw there! I wish I could have gone... It makes you realize just how much clout the HHA has... (Lyle) Ha ha ha! Oh, Mr. Nook! Me? Clout? You're good at busting ol' Lyle's chops! So embarrassed! Anyhoo. Not like I was sightseeing... Again. Strictly business. Did get some face time with Resetti himself, though. Quite an honor! Ol' Lyle? A bit starstruck! He's so famous! Everyone knows him. Few get into the inner sanctum. Ol' Lyle feels a bit special. (Nook) Well, now you're just boasting, Mr. Lyle... (Lyle) Am I?! Oh! So sorry! A bit flustered by all this confidentiality! Ol' Lyle's not used to all this! Guess I got a bit carried away. Bragging like this... In front of the mayor, too! Unforgivable! (alt:) (Lyle) Am I?! Oh! So sorry! A bit flustered by all this confidentiality! Ol' Lyle's not used to all this! Got a bit carried away. Guess I'm worried about spilling industry secrets by accident. Better zip it up right now! Boom! ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Wow. Let me tell you. Been getting into chess a lot lately. Big time. Student of the game. Serious stuff. Don't go busting Lyle's chops! Not ready for tournament play just yet. Just getting warmed up! Thinking man's game, chess. Lyle? Not much experience before coming here. A real chess novice. But lately? Mr. Nook and I? Daily matches. Daily! It's become a habit! Best way to end a work day! Boom! Isn't that right, Mr. Nook? Had quite the heated match the other day. Played long into the night! And that Mr. Nook! Quite the shark! Shrewd as they come! Started off even greener than ol' Lyle. But now? Takes notes! Reads strategy books! Studies up! Even gets mad and busts ol' Lyle's chops if I take too long to make a move! Very competitive! (Nook) Well, Mr. Lyle puts too much emphasis on big, showy moves! He takes his time setting them up! Chess is like business... If you take too long in planning, you may suffer when it's time to execute! I'm best at adapting to the circumstances and making little adjustments, building as I go! (Lyle) The other day, I thought I'd finally win a match against him, but... then I accidentally tipped the board over. All those moves I played to get so close to victory were wasted... Anyhoo. Ol' Lyle has to be careful. Mr. Nook is getting better and better! No careless moves for me! ------------------------------------------------------------ (Lyle) Heh. Havin' one of those "awwww" moments right now. Thinking about a good thing that happened to me. So. I have two daughters. Younger one comes by the store. Just to see me! Ol' Lyle's buttons popped off! Said she just wanted to watch me at work. Study her pop. Take some notes. Made ol' Lyle so proud! Good day for it, too, Mr. Nook! You had gone out for a bit. Put ol' Lyle in charge! Made me look good! Used to switch jobs a lot. When the girls were younger. Put a little bit of stress on the ol' family... So. This job? Decided to stick it out. Make it work. Make a go of it. So glad I did! (Nook) Ho ho! Let me tell you! When I came back from running my errands that day... I thought I was seeing double! Lyle's daughter really looks just like a little Lyle! It's amazing how powerful genetics can be... (Lyle) Heh heh. Well. When the girls were younger? Didn't care to hear that. Didn't want to look like the ol' man! Said they wanted to look like little thems. Not little mes. Guess ol' Lyle can understand that... But now? We all look back on those days and laugh. Laugh out loud. Laugh together! Good times. Boom. ------------------------------------------------------------ [I really have no idea what this one's about... I assume what I've marked as "[WHAT]" is a randomized food item, like the Able Sisters convo, but what the part I've marked as "[NAME]" could be is stumping me. maybe it puts one of your other human character's names in there, or something like that. Couldn't find any screenshots of this convo, so yeah, no idea. :/] (Lyle) Little surprise the other day. [NAME]? Loaded us up with treats! Tasty, tasty treats! I've been wanting a quality [WHAT], to be honest. His/Her family sent some good ones! Bam! Not particularly scarce in these parts, but still! Hard to turn down a fine [WHAT]. Right? Right! Excellent, weren't they, Mr. Nook?! Everyone who tried [WHAT] sang its praises! No way we could eat 'em all. So we took 'em out. Shared 'em with our shopping-district pals. Glad to do it! Took some to the Able sisters. Some to Timmy and Tommy. And, of course, some to... Gracie and Harriet! We just had to share with them! Everyone who got one was happy and satisfied! (alt 1:) K.K. Slider and Shrunk! We just had to share with them! Everyone who got one was happy and satisfied! (alt 2:) Pelly and Phyllis! We just had to share with them! Everyone who got one was happy and satisfied! We business folks? Gotta stick together! Support each other! Keep each other going! Bang! Mr. Nook and I? Happy to share! Our business? Only works when we all happily attract customers! ------------------------------------------------------------ Those Able sisters. Must enjoy working. Hardly ever take a break! --- Hoo! That weed-pulling contest! Got to see a side of Leif I've never seen before! Bang! --- Heh. Little confession: still can't tell Timmy and Tommy apart sometimes... --- Shampoodle. Popular place. Lot of it has to do with Harriet's winning personality. Simple truth. And what a cheerful voice! Makes ol' Lyle feel like he can do anything! Climb oceans! Swim mountains! --- Funny when you think about it: Some folks? Visit Club LOL never knowing Shrunk's comedy chops. Me? Amazed! What a history! --- Bit of K.K. Slider insider info: Song requests? Anything you wanna hear Saturdays? He said to let him know! Gives me an idea! Think I'll take my daughters to a show! Boom! --- Think I can learn from Phyllis. Learn how to take work a bit more seriously. Nose to the grindstone! But... Better not say that to her. Bet she'd get mad at ol' Lyle. Bust chops like there's no tomorrow! --- Blathers. Celeste. Boom. Get along really well for siblings. Nice to see. Still. Sometimes. Feels like ol' Lyle needs a PhD to talk to 'em... --- Wow. Resetti. So much I can't talk about. Gonna bury the secrets deep. Might burst, though. Might burst! --- Gotta watch out for Mr. Nook. Becoming a chess master, that one! Wouldn't be surprised to see him with a custom set. Wouldn't be surprised at all! --- Everyone in my family looks the same. Lots of folks think it. Quite a few even say it! My daughters? Kind of gotten used to it. Took a while, though! Ol' Lyle thinks there's still some resentment. --- This shop? Customer friendly. Folks stop by. Just to chat. All the time! And, [NAME]? Stop by anytime! Feel free!
Morning, [NAME]. Hope you're doin' well today. Ol' Lyle? Always doin' well. Listen. If you're struggling with something, be sure to ask Lottie about it. You might have guessed this, but... that sweet little thing? She's ol' Lyle's niece. Couldn't be more proud of her. But...ol' Lyle does worry. It's all that makeup she wears. Boom. ------------------------------------------------------------ It's that client! From earlier! The one who ran away from ol' Lyle is just...standin' outside the office! Ya know, ol' Lyle's always been better suited to workin' behind the scenes than to customer service... Customer service seems like more of a YOU thing. So we'll just leave it to YOU... Bang!